February 12 Pearl

February 12

I’m irritable today. I think I’m tired of pain and not being able to do anything. I need ten hours of sleep each night and then I’m awake for three hours and feel like I’ve worked a twelve hour day.

This is getting old. I’m over it. I’m ready to move on and get well. Yesterday my pain level was through the roof. I’m not sure why? I don’t think I did anything different.? It hasn’t been much better today. I’m taking pain meds in the evening, and I don’t want to go backwards and take meds during the day too.

I’d be real tired if I had to go back to taking more meds. I guess I’m out of control and frustrated. I don’t like my lack of energy and the extra pain.

What can I do? I need to stay connected to the Lord. John 15:5: I am the vine, you are the branches. If you remain in me and I in you, you will bear much fruit; apart from me you can do nothing.

Clearly I can’t pull myself up by my own boot straps and heal myself physically or produce the fruit of the spirit while I’m going through this time.

I need to stay connected to Jesus, the vine. A constipated branch is all I am if I’m not connected to the tree. I need some of Jesus’s sap to flow through me. I need to get a little sappy.

I’ve been snappy, just not sappy.

My Pearl today is that I have a place to run to..my Lord’s arms. I will cry my heart out to Him and ask him to make me sappy.

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